Pursuing Christ, adoption and contentment in a world of comparison, competition, and shallow vision.
Many times we cannot hear God's voice because we want him to speak our language. Only when we love him so much that we prefer his ways to ours will we be open to receive his gracious revelation of himself.
We are in the thick of it. We are in trudging through so much at once. We are waking up every day asking God to give us guidance to make the right decisions and laying down at night hoping we did. We are so often seeing glimmers of hope, connection, and trust built and at the same time scratching our heads and wondering if our small acts matter (though we know deep down they do!). We are doing this thing called foster care, we feel torn and stretched by it and worn down by it. We feel so many emotions and it has only been 3 months. For our boys, it's been over three Y E A R S. In my moments of doubt and frustration I remember that they have been dealing with all this and more without a stable home or adult to lean on, all while trying to be a kid and grow up and discover who they are.
But even in my short engagement with the system so far, I have experienced more emotional turbulence, anxiety, and even depression than I ever have before. In my short stint, I can see the impact of …
I told you so.
Honestly, my biggest fear is receiving this sentiment from people once our kids get here and it's freaking hard for us. Throughout our process, I've heard/seen it all: the horror stories, concerned looks, reminders of baggage, reminders that babies are easier, reminders kids are expensive, reminders that I won't be their only mom and they may have struggles and I'm too young to be their mom and I'm not the same race and it will strain my marriage and that I can't save them.
(Run on sentence on purpose becaus that's how all these reminders feel - endless and just on and on they go.)
I'm worried that when I'm asked, "how are you?"and I give an honest answer about the pain and hurt and sorrow that comes when you're loving children you didn't raise, that people will look and feel and respond with an "I told you so." They may not say it out loud, but I know the exact look that will be on their faces. They'l…
It's a very strange feeling when you feel you have to prove to the world why you want your kids. I know what you're thinking, You don't have to explain yourself! You don't have to prove anything! And, you would be right. I don't owe it to anyone. If I'm honest though, I know most of the questions that come are based in ignorance and a lack of exposure to the need/availability/crisis that is adoption and foster care. So, I don't answer because I feel pressured, but because I genuinely want people to be educated. I want them to know that despite the challenge, time, sacrifice, and "risk," my children deserve all of that and more spent on them. They deserve to have a home where they are accepted and seen, no matter their age or their "troubled" backgrounds (much of which they had no control of).
Anyway, I could go on about that all day, but I won't (you're welcome).
Below I will highlight the most frequently asked questions about ou…